Well, the word chippy doesn't cut it. But last night, the 5-time champion Forcs showed exactly what they are capable of when it comes to dominating a CCSL game. Final score, 22-7 and it wasn't close. The SPTR frustration regrettably showed in the 6th. Some baserunning 'issues' occured late in the game but will not be discussed publicly. Everyone got drunk.Recap
For some reason, the Forc bats were alive last night. As the away team, the Franklin led off the top of the 1st in the following fashion. Renardo, single, Adam, single, Mgmt, single, MMN, single, Pete, double, Mickey, single, out out single out. 5 runs. This was followed by 0 runs by SPTR, then single, double, single, 3 run homerun into the street by MMN, single.....5 more runs. 10-0 after 1.5 innings. Pretty good. Both teams then kept trading runs for the next couple of innings before the it finally got out of hand. Final score 22-7.
The Good
Well, where to start? So much good hitting hard to remember it all and I don't have the book. The following had at least 3 hits: MMN, Verne Siebert, Renardo, Mgmt, Mickey, Pete. Many rookies had hits as well including, Gonzo, New Pell, Situajim. Jason had at least two hits, one to left field! Alyssa had a hit. Timmeh nearly had a homerun. I had two field goals. Lots and lots and lots of hits. Hopefully we're not done for the year. Chandra and Matty showed up, both injured.
The Bad
Chippiness. Hate it when those things happen. Mistakes on both sides. Meh. Mgmt had to be calmed down by the new Zen Master Jeremy. Wow. Weird world we live in. Oh, and we ran out of pounders! Not cool, Edward. Not cool.
The Franklin Mystique
Shortly after the lopsided loss, new coach Alvin & the Taproom was seen with a whistle making his team run sprints on the left field line. "This is unacceptable! I'm going to run them till they puke!" No one ended up puking, but Pam's dog took a dump in the bat bag. Maybe someone will think it's pine tar.
Lumber Liquidator Studs of the Week
Everyone who batted
MMN for the furthest ball I've seen hit at that field.
Elmer for not eating anyone
Zen Master Jeremy
Obama
NASDAQ Trade of the Week
Pete's new bat has some early pop! Plan accordingly
Cialis Boner of the Week
Aside from other issues, this one goes to Ed Wagner, for scheduling the rivalry game during his last Shakespeare reading class. Nope, didn't make that up. Can't make that up. Not that clever.
Paul Watch
Planning on showing up and playing versus SPTR, Matty was accosted on his way to the game by a large (but not tall) figure who wanted to arm wrestle him and talk about his new marriage. Following 12 rounds of arm wrestling, Matty felt a twinge in his arm and looked down to notice that the figure had ripped it off and was making a necklace out of his fingers. Matty is out 2-3 weeks.
Benedict Pickle's Historical Reference of the Week
Osama bin Laden killed, 5/1/11. How could it not be?
Also, for funsies:
On this day, 5/2/1536 Anne Boleyn, Queen of England, is arrested and imprisoned on charges of adultery, incest, treason and witchcraft. She was probably innocent on the last charge. Otherwise, sounds like a reincarnated La Nice.
Ed Wagner's Movie of the Week
Much Ado About Nothing, 1983
Shakespeare and Keanu Reeves. "Um, et tu, um, Brute dude?"
Phyllis Demo's Retro Porn Movie of the Week
Buns 'N Roses, 1990
Quotes From the Week
"Are you okay playing tonite? Ya know with the whole Bin laden thing....do you have to make prayer and shi-hada?"
Elmer
"See, hit it to the shortstop!"
PHH
"This is like hitting against the Academy!"
All first 7 hitters
"Elmer saw your bomb, Nick, now he's gonna swing like the passed a law against pillaging."
"Where's Pickle?"
"He has organ donor practice."
"Is that short Pam?"
"Yes, sitting right next to Tall Carol."
"I can hit to the right side!!!!!"
A very elated Alvin & the Taproom
"I don't know half of your team anymore."
"Neither do I."
Zen Master Jeremy and the Management
"I am the only player in CCSL history to hit two balls through the goal posts and not get a hit."
"Are the cones lined up?"
"Who cares? They're cones!"
The anti-Ford
"What do you think Phyllis is doing right now?"
"Or who?"
"Too easy, I would have preferred, 'Probably the One-armed Thigh Shaker.'"
"6-12!"
Fordo, passed out on his Lazyboy with leftover soup on his shirt.
"The Nazis had some good ideas!"
Pell
"Do you think Ryan will take it easy on us on the Blog tomorrow?"
"I hope so. I'm so sad, I don't think I could take a ribbing."
Benson and Blonde Benson
"What happened to my goat?"
"Elmer took it into his van......I'd ask for the hooves back when he's done."
"Let us suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous gayness."
Ed
good job!
ReplyDeleteSenior Management here. I am glad to see that (junior) management has been so diligent in the blog upkeep. Though many of us have real jobs, he is forced to sit at home in his underwear, waiting and hoping for the phone to ring with some job offer to take him far away from here – anywhere, but apparently Atlanta (not a happy ending there). And his main activity – after updating the blog, of course! - is to drink beer and decide whether to use the nearby facilities or just go into the bottle he’s drinking (and I wish to point out that Senior Management has continually stressed the need to use an empty bottle, not the one he is still consuming – all to no avail).
ReplyDeleteSo, the Senior Management is happy to take one for the team with the weekly CB award, though – as (junior) management pointed out – it was far more deserved by the man who shall remain sleeveless. Apparently, the offense was mistakenly thinking that the Force could beat a top opponent without Senior Management being there – despite the fact the Senior Management dutifully brought the beer beforehand to ensure no crying or throwing of toys. Oh, and we did win 22-7. This was not some minor issue like the threat – or promise (such a fine line!) – of the (junior) management skipping town at the end of the season when things really heat up and not helping the Force defend its championship in – hopefully - the playoffs. No, apparently missing a game (after bringing the beer) at the beginning of the season to pursue greater knowledge is the ultimate offense. And the Senior Management would like to point out that we were reading “The Roaring Girl,” by Thomas Middleton and Thomas Dekker, not, as (junior) management stated, by Shakespeare. Of course, Senior Management figured that the (junior) management used the only playwright/director/singer he could recall who sounded important, and hoped that he was correct.
And speaking of beer, despite bringing an extra half-case of pounders, the team once again reportedly ran out. Since this event only takes place when the Senior Management is not in attendance, we are forced to conclude that either the squad is playing an extended version of “Hit the Can” and soaking the field with a case+ of beer, or they’re inadvertently opening the cans upside down and pouring the beer out until they look down, notice the spillage and flip the can upright - only to find it empty… and then repeating the cycle with the next can. Senior Management may be forced to write “This Side Up” on all of the cans with a Sharpie, or possibly issue pounder sippy cups to the team. Such responsibility.